Luckily I had the day off today because the minerds had some big shot Japanese clients in and they didnt need or want me around for some reason (maybe its the impersonations I do of my Korean university friends) . I was glad to have the time off, its been so hectic lately trying to cram in all the stuff in Oz that I wanted to do before i go. Instead of doing a bunch of crazy running around today I decided to just go spend some time on the beach with a sixa of Tooheys and the sun. It was great to get some alone time to do some thinking. Not many people on the beach today so I was left with my thoughts and the seagulls. I guess after some thinking I reallized I wasnt being true to myself while I was here. Dont get me wrong, I have been having a tons of fun but not really being honest. Like Jono will ask me how I'm doing and Ill say 'great' but really Im kind of sad or lonely but I dont feel like I can tell him or anybody else here. I kind of feel guilty because I am in God Damned Australia and I should be having the time of my life but all I can think of is being back home. I kind of shrug it off and over compensate by being loud and joking and drinking alot. I dont know how to be myself and I wish I could. It was a relief to think of this because I really didnt know what was bothering-it just knew it was something. I sort of tried to comunicate this to Sara over the phone but its so awkward on the phone. I need to be face to face with somebody to have a meaningful talk. But I am going to do the best with my last week here to enjoy this beautiful, great country and do it by being the real Conor. I think Australia deserves that and its the least I can do.
Thanks for listening, you may not know it, but it helps.
Conor
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment